Earlier this week as I was heading to my doctor's office, I experienced a rather awkward elevator moment. As soon as the door closed behind me (I was the last to jump aboard), a big, burly, bearded man in the back of the elevator and to my right began to converse with the person immediately behind me who was wearing a knit cap pulled down almost over their eyes and a gender neutral sweat suit. Here is how it went:
Burly man - "How are you doing?"
Quiet person - No response.
Burly man - "Excuse me, are you a man or a woman?"
Quiet person - "A woman."
Burly man - "You sure are quiet"
Quiet person - "Not a good day."
Burly man - "Why is that?"
Quiet person - No response.
Thankfully at that moment, the elevator door opened and Quiet Person got off. Once the door closed, Burly Man said to his friend, "Hmmm. Guess I should not have asked her that question" (duh ... now that's the first smart thing I heard the guy say!). Then he added, "But I just hate it when people respond like that!"
Ouch! There is one guy who has no tact whatsoever! But as I reflected on this unfortunate exchange, it got me thinking about my own interactions with people (those I know and those I don't). Am I tactful? Do I show respect? Am I fulfilling God's mandate on how I should be talking to others?
Friends, if we keep the mandate God gives us to govern the use of our tongue in our everyday conversations, we will avoid awkward moments such as the one I experienced (and this poor woman endured.) So what is this mandate? Here it is . . . Read it! Memorize it! Pray it! Practice it!
"Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but ONLY such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear" (Ephesians 4:29).
Are you hearing what God is telling us? If we are to fulfill this mandate, we must begin our conversations with a willingness to listen. Only as we listen will we be able to speak words which "fit the occasion" and build up those with whom we are conversing ... giving them grace! Our problem is that far too often we are too focused on what WE want to say to give much thought (if any) to what the people to whom we are talking with need to hear.
It was very obvious to me that Burly Man in the elevator did not have this woman in mind in his conversation with her. That came out in the words he was saying and how we was saying them. I am guessing that as she exited the elevator, her bad day had just got worse.
I hope that is not true for you today as you read my post!
Thanks for stopping by . . .
pj